Miscarriage - Hold Me Now

Ha-Yotzeir, One Who shaped me,
Who formed me out of moistened clay,
Who rolled and pinched and sculpted the world,
hold me now.

You Who enable wisps of seeds to grow,
Who partnered the life which grew inside me,
shelter me.

Life was gifted. Life removed.

Ha-Yotzeir, shape a place where I can weep
and mourn the loss and
let the empty place inside me
cry.

Help me say goodbye to the child
who was growing within me,
to the dreams I bore,
to the love I held for that ripening soul,
plucked away.

Let my voice ring, a mother's call, wild to the universe.

And You, stand by me, at my side,
and watch my tears fall and touch earth.
Hear my pain and hold me.

Life grows in realms of shadow and light.
Black of night bequeaths rest to the soul.
Darkness bears gifts.
Renewal to growing things.
Both have much to teach me.

The rhythms of the earth,
as steady as the beat of the heart,
light and dark, and dark and light,
continue.

Sun rises and sun sets.
Night falls and then sun rises once again.

Ha-Yotzeir, You Who shaped me,
heal my body and my soul.
Mend my spirit.
Thread new life among my bones.

Ha-Yotzeir, You Who shaped me
walk with me this while.

Companion me,
hold my tears and lift my soul.
Help me to find ground again,
to feel the earth beneath my toes,
to smell the beckoning scent of rich soil,
to see the shoots of green emerge through winter bed, determined hands grasping life,
to hear the sap rushing within.

Ha-Yotzeir,
Shaper of new forms, Sower of life,
Plant within me kernels of new visions.

I kneel to plant a seed of life,
an act of faith.
Take my hand and for a time,
hold it tight.